Never thought it’d be a day..

4 Feb

So I been thinking about Mr. Man a lot lately… You know sitting back a weighing the pros and cons of our relationship (or lack thereof). We went from talking everyday to barely speaking at all. When he hits me up it’s always ‘babe this’ or ‘[insert his nickname for me here] I miss you’. I mean.. ok. I guess. Do you even really mean that?

I don’t know what it is.. Speaking to him just isn’t the same. Could I picture myself with him? I don’t know. He’s changed. I know he has a lot going on, but so do I. I don’t ask for much from him, but he acts as if I want him to devote every moment to me. He treats me as if I’m being selfish for wanting to hear from him for more than 5 minutes a week.

And now it’s gotten to the point where I just don’t even notice it anymore. Days going by without speaking to him is regular. When he comes around, he comes around. It’s whatever. My time is consumed by school, studying, and people looking to replace him.

I hit him up today. No response. We got into a minor argument last night about him not calling me like he told me he was going to do earlier in the day. I mean honestly, I really wasn’t mad at all because I wasn’t expecting the phone call he promised anyway. I just wanted to point it out to him that I don’t believe what he says to me anymore.

So after I sent my message to him, I pretty much said fuck it, started texting my dearies and turned on my iTunes. Funny how this song is the one that popped up on shuffle. How fitting…

Baby it’s a shame to see that being without you ain’t a thing to me.
Never thought it’d come a time that I..
I don’t love you anymore…

♥ April Rose

6 Responses to “Never thought it’d be a day..”

  1. Ashley Outrageous February 4, 2009 at 10:06 PM #

    wow; i feel the eaxct way sometimes; it just hasnt hit me yet to let go cause i still have hope; but for long ya kno?

    Reply
  2. fly=malcolm=x February 4, 2009 at 11:12 PM #

    I DIDNT KNOW YOU WERE DATING SOMEONE!…IM SEMI-JEALOUS!

    Reply
  3. April Rose February 5, 2009 at 12:21 AM #

    Ashley – I know. It’s like you want to hold out because you want it get better, but then there just comes a time when you realize you’re not being fair to yourself.

    Glenn – No need to be semi-jealous of him lol.

    Reply
  4. franii [fran-daddy] February 5, 2009 at 3:01 PM #

    arent we all in that boat… :(

    Reply
  5. Dizzy♥ February 5, 2009 at 7:50 PM #

    ^^ I concur.
    Story of our livez….

    Reply
  6. Sara February 6, 2009 at 5:25 PM #

    Gah, what a dummy. =( I hate the fact that ppl string other ppl along. Priorities… get em, right? =\

    Reply

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