When I was 5, it seemed like my life goals were so clear and simple. “April is going to be a neurosurgeon. She’s going to Harvard Medical School and she’s going to be at the top of her field. She’ll be married with two kids, a boy and a girl & live in a big house right outside of the city.” Heh.. I was really advanced for my age. But as you grow up, life gets complicated. Your vision gets a bit blurry and sometimes you become.. lost.
In my head, I’ve switched my profession a million times. Shit, in the past week alone I’ve wanted to be a high school guidance counselor, athletic trainer, sports psychologist, photographer, homemaker, trophy wife… and the list goes on. I mean, I’ve found what I’m good at. I’m a Psychology major and I’ve had nothing but A’s in my Psych courses.. so why am I still unsure? Yeah I can discuss Erikson and Bronfenbrenner, but does it matter if I’m good at what I do if I’m not happy?
I find that my heart’s not in Psychology oftentimes. Sometimes I wish I stuck it out with Journalism in high school. Apparently, my teacher and my peers thought I showed promise. Other days I wish I could get over my disdain of Biology to get through Athletic Training. I always used to tell people to watch out for me on the sidelines of an NFL game.
But at 21 and with 3 years of college under my belt, I still don’t know “what I want to be when I grow up” and it’s kind of scary. Have I been wasting my time? Should I have gone down another path? Should I just stick with what I’m good at?
Fuck.
nice post. yeah, just stick with what you’re good at. and if you put your heart into whatever you are in, you’ll be fine.
You know what, babes? This is the EXACT same thing I’ve been going through as of late. I’m a Prof. Writing major & a psych. minor and while I make excellent grades in my writing courses and LOVE writing, I find myself having ideas of going to law school afterwards. Only reason I’m planning on going tho is to be able to take care of my mom and my little brother.
I’m still not certain either of what I want to do either and it kills me everyday. I hate to keep switching up my shit because honestly, next to writing, there’s nothing that I could see myself doing. The best advice that I can give you is to follow where you heart tells you.